East Bay is OK

I hella heart Oakland.

I dare you...no implore you biased, pompous San Franciscans to get off that island (SF is an island more than a peninsula, let's be frank) and visit the East Bay. We got it goin on over here. Yeah, its more spread out than your dense pseudo-metropolis. Yeah, we drive cars over here. Yeah, its slower over here. But you know what, it's better over here too.

The weather's better than that windy, fogbox you live in. The food's better (yeah, I said it). It's cheaper over here. We have more personal space over here. We have more grass and parks over here. We're the gateway to the rest of California and the U.S. (did you forget?!)

So leave your excuses at your BART station and get your ass over here. Don't front about getting back because you can always sleep on my pull-out couch/bed or I'll drive you back (no sweat!). But it's worth the trip. You don't need a passport to cross the Bay just some initiative.

P.S.--I don't want your pity when I say that I live in the East Bay. There's no other place I'd rather be. Don't furrow your brow and make that sad "ohhh/awww" noise because I don't wanna hear it. Open your horizons. You're San Francisco you're supposed to be liberal.